Hilarious and Jaw-Dropping Stories About Exes
We’ve all got a story or two about an ex we’d rather leave in the past—and our readers didn’t hold back.
They shared some jaw-dropping,
cringe-worthy, and downright
hilarious stories of exes who are best forgotten.

1. Cheers to the Memories: After we broke up, I was at a bar with friends when I spotted my ex.
I sent him a drink with a note that said, “Cheers to the memories!” He shot back with a note, “Cheers to my next victim!”
Suddenly, he jumped up and began karaoke-ing our breakup song off-key, and the whole bar erupted in laughter. Just when I
thought it couldn’t get worse, he pulled out a cardboard cutout of me, claiming it was his “emotional support ex.” As he
tried to throw it at me, he accidentally knocked over a table instead. The bartender handed me a free drink, saying,
“Here’s to surviving your nightmare!” By the end of the night, we had both become the stars of the show, and I left feeling
like I’d dodged a bullet!

2. Google Calendar Sabotage: My ex hacked into my Google Calendar and added a bunch of random,
embarrassing events titled things like “Cry Session,” “Remember You’re Alone,” and “Rejection Practice.” Very creative,
but it felt like a daily reminder of my heartbreak! After a week, I got an invite to a “Self-Care Workshop” hosted by none
other than my ex. Curious, I clicked the link and discovered he was running a virtual seminar on emotional healing, using
the very events he’d added to my calendar as discussion points!

3. Hair Locket Mystery: My ex gave me this vintage silver locket. After we broke up, I tossed it in a drawer.
A year later, my new bf found it while cleaning. “Why don’t you wear it? It’s nice,” he said, handing it to me. Curious, we
pried it open, expecting nothing, but inside was a small, brittle note and a tiny lock of hair. The note read: “So you’ll
always be with me.” The hair? It was mine.

4. Parking Spot Pettiness: My ex knew my favorite parking spot in front of my building and somehow managed
to get a sign installed that read ’Reserved for [his name].’ Every time I tried to park there, I’d have to see his name on
the sign. It was so absurd that even my neighbors got a laugh out of it. Eventually, the sign was removed, but I’ll never
forget that weird, petty gesture.

5. The Case of the Missing Socks: After we broke up, I started noticing that random pairs of my socks were
missing. Turns out, my ex had taken just one sock from each pair before leaving. He left me with a collection of mismatched
socks, making my mornings a nightmare. It took forever to rebuild my sock collection, and I still occasionally find an odd
one he must have missed.

6. The Lost Cat Ruse: After we ended things, my ex got a little too into the idea of being a ’cat person.’
He started a Facebook group called ’Looking for My Lost Cat,’ where he posted pictures of random cats in the neighborhood
with captions like, ’Maybe he’s at [my name]’s house!’ I had to block him after getting dozens of messages from friends
trying to help him find his ’lost’ cat.

7. Midnight Caller: My ex calls me from different numbers at 2 a.m., pretending to be other people. It’s
relentless. Even after blocking so many numbers, I still never know when the next call will come.

8. The Everywhere Ex: Everywhere I went, there he was. It didn’t matter if I was at the grocery store, my
gym, or a concert—he would “happen” to be there. The weird part was that I’d never told him where I’d be, so he was clearly
going out of his way to track me down. He’d act surprised every time, asking, “Oh, funny seeing you here! Do you come here
often?” It started feeling like I was living in a small town with only one shop, one gym, and one restaurant.

9. Uninvited Family Guest: Even after our breakup, she still shows up uninvited at my family gatherings,
acting like nothing happened. My family doesn’t want to be rude, so they let her stay, but I feel like I can’t escape.

10. Pet Custody Drama: He insisted on keeping our dog, but every time I see a picture, it’s clear he’s not
taking good care of him. I’m tempted to start a legal battle just for the dog’s sake.

11. Social Media Stalker: Whenever I started seeing someone new, my ex would somehow find out and start
following them on social media, even sending them DMs. He’d hint that I was “still in love with him” or that I’d been “seeing
other people” while we were still together, which wasn’t true. It made dating a nightmare because every time I met someone,
I’d have to explain that my ex was a part-time stalker.

12. Friend Sabotage: He started hanging out with one of my closest friends and would use their hangouts to
send me messages or remind me of “the good old days.” I ended up losing my friend in the process, as she thought I was
overreacting by wanting to keep my distance.

13. ER Fakeout: Once, he texted me in the middle of the night, claiming he was in the ER and didn’t have
anyone else to reach out to. I rushed over, worried about his health, only to find him sitting there, completely fine. He
just wanted to see me and knew I wouldn’t ignore an emergency.